Traveling solo as a woman is daunting. It just is.

I’m 5ft 6in tall (168cm) and I weigh 125 lbs (57kg). I don’t consider myself small, but I also don’t think I’m the definition of tough, either. The point being: when I travel solo, my first instinct is to be reserved and try not to draw too much attention to myself. So when I went to Hawaii alone, I had to force myself outside my comfort zone.

Allow me to back up. I spent nearly all of September 2017 on the island of Oahu, Hawaii. I was 19 at the time, and had travelled by myself only once prior. But I had two friends who were going to be on the island at the same time. One friend, Megan, was vacationing with her family. The other friend, Bruce, attended college on the island.

Both of them were kind enough to allow me to stay with them throughout month. That first week, I was attached at the hip with Megan – and we did everything. Skydiving, shark diving, helicopter rides — you name it. The adrenaline rush we sought out that week was unthinkable.

But then it was time for her to head home and I started on the second, and more developmental, half of my trip.

I arrived at my friend’s college dorm carrying my giant travelers backpack, ready to party it up with America’s youth. But one thing I hadn’t thought about was the fact that all the students had to go to class (yes, I realize how this sounds now). But I realized very quickly I was going to be much more alone for the next three weeks than I anticipated.

I won’t lie to you. The following day all I did was watch Netflix. I was nervous, not sure where to go, and no idea what to do. I wasted a beautiful day on Oahu to binge watch trashy television. It wasn’t until the sun was setting and the day was coming to an end that I realized how frustrated with myself I was. And I told myself it wouldn’t happen again.

So the following morning, I woke up with one plan: do something. I grabbed my computer and backpack, got an Uber to a Starbucks and worked on freelance projects across from Waikiki Beach. A few hours later, I tossed on my swimsuit and swam in the ocean. And I was alone, but I was unbelievably happy.

Over the next three weeks, I did so many things I couldn’t name them all. I took a surfing lesson with Big Wave Dave Surf Shop, and befriended the other girl in my class. After we both wiped out dozens of times, we went hopping around the island to different restaurants our surf instructor recommended us.

I took an island bus tour. During it, I experienced the Dole Plantation, snorkeled with sea turtles and ate some of the best corn on the cob of my life.

I spent over five hours wandering Pearl Harbor.

I made a great friend and we hiked Koko Crater together to watch the sunset.

I look back on my month in Oahu as a period of exponential growth. I made dozens of friendships and laughed constantly (even when alone!). And while I may never see those people again, they are forever in my heart and memory.

So yes, traveling solo is daunting. It’s hard where you don’t know where to start. But it’s all in your head.

Ask the locals what they recommend. Be friendly and don’t be afraid of rejection. And do things. Even if you’re afraid to.

P.S. Thank you Hawaii 🙂 I’ll be back.